I just don't want anything, dreams, thoughts, wants, feelings of any kind.
I am not an artist.
I just want to slip into the American rut. Work to pay bills that allow me to call a place home and maybe watch some TV before bed. Get wasted on weekends to pass the time and snub realities. There is nothing to offer, especially from a broken man as myself.
Exist, you don't have to make a difference, contribute, or leave a mark.
Perspective, we are really nothing anyway. A spec in a flash of light. In a thousand years, even hundreds, why did you matter? Might as well get high and fuck, it's just my own mind's experience in my own short glimpse of reality.
Consider life as a day off, what would you do? Something productive? Help others? Lay around all day drinking stout, close the night with masturbation and falling asleep to a film with subtitles? These are all lifelong achievements depending how life is lived. They all have the same impact and can sum up a man's existence on this shit orb.
I need to turn off, live simple and easy, just do until you are done. It is a common system, most are ok with it. You do not have to be something special. Just doing what must be done in order to take care of head.
